Hand to Mouth

Finn is getting pretty good at finding his hand with his mouth, even getting his thumb sometimes, but the downside is he's wacking himself in the head more. When I start talking to him, once he clue's in that I'm there and looks at me, I usually get a big grin. They're golden. Just pure joy shining out of this little soul. Of course 2 minutes later I get a funny frown, so maybe I shouldn't read emotions into testing the facial muscles. Smiles sure are nice for me though.

It's hard that I get to hold him so little. When I get home from work Oliver needs attention and Mama needs a little break to catch her breath. So Oliver gets most of my attention, I'll hold Finn a little bit, but pretty quickly I need my hands to play, or we need to eat dinner, or Finn is needing to nurse. When it's added up, it's not very much time at all that I'm holding him. I'm more relaxed about this then I was with Oliver, I think the perspective of having gone through it once I'm more confident that when Finn is bigger and a little more independent from Mama he'll find me more, they only recently became two seperate organisms. Still, I was proud of myself for getting him back to sleep twice last night when he was fussy.

First vaccine at the end of the week. I want to be there for Finn, because it's my place. But I'm betting that I'll need to be there to run interference on Oliver so he doesn't get worried about his brother. And if this one does bother Finn (Oliver was pissed when he got shots this small) Finn will just want his Mama's milk to reassure him that the mean scary bugs are done biting him. (Speaking of, Oliver was recently telling us that we are as mean as small barky dogs (which he has direcct experience of them being mean)). Oliver is still doing well with Finn, if I'm paying attention to Finn Oliver often comes up and tries to hug him and pets his head and says "I love you" to him.